unsettled

I have to be careful what I blog about these days. Luke can read so much and he loves to look at the blog. I don't want to embarrass him.

But he's kind of lost interest in my blog lately. Who can blame him?

The last 3 weeks seem like about 3 months. I guess we're settling in to school.

I love his teacher. LOVE her. She is incredibly kind, really funny, and always positive. She emails me regularly and if she thinks I'm crazy, she's does a great job of hiding it.

Luke seems to like school. He's still pretty quiet about it, but I get a few more details than I used to. This week I learned that one of his new friends has a Wii at her house. And I heard about when "suddenly it started raining really big rain drops on the playground and we had to run really fast back into class. And then Mrs. Wheeler said 'Welcome to Wheeler Theater' and we watched Sid the Science Kid."

Many staff members already know Luke by name. I don't know if I should be pleased or a little alarmed.

I volunteered in his classroom the past two Fridays. I was amazed by his improvement in one week. He knew the routine better and was staying more engaged. But he was recovering from strep the first week.

This past Friday I heard Luke ask Mrs. Wheeler, "Can I color now?" First time he's ever asked to color.

On Wednesday he brought home a worksheet he had not completed in class. He sat down and enthusiastically completed the worksheet which involved much coloring. And he took it back to show Mrs. Wheeler the next day. Amazing.

He's come home with some new words and phrases I'm not pleased with, but that is the reality of school. Today I recommended he ask me or his teacher if new words and phrases are nice before repeating them. (Though I'm pretty sure he knew "You are the meanest girl in the world!" wasn't nice but he just wanted to say it. He could have honestly been confused about "shut up" though.)

I expected a few bumps in the road. I honestly expected a rougher transition.

I didn't expect the reality of being the only "special needs" kid in the class to feel isolating. I want him in a room of typical peers. I believe it is exactly the stimulating environment he needs. But my little built in preschool support group of "special moms" is now spread across schools around the county. I miss them.

I'm so used to the funny ways Luke phrases his sentences. I didn't expect to be blown away by how articulate and mature 5 year old girls are.

And I didn't expect to have no clue what to do with myself when Luke's at school 7 hours a day. Well, I have a list of things I could do. A huge list. Just need the motivation to get started.

So apparently God still teaching me much about letting go of my expectations and walking with faith on this crazy windy path of parenting my special boy.

One kind of funny story:

I was at school Friday and the kids as Luke's class was lining up for lunch. Luke was asking his teacher what she was going to eat. (He's kind of intrigued that she doesn't eat with them.) Then he said, "Can I see?" And sweet Mrs. Wheeler opened her lunch bag and let him look in. He squealed, "Pizza!!!! Oh my goodness!!!"